Waiting Room

What a difficult place to be! I have to believe that this waiting has a purpose. I know that God's ways are always best, so much better than we can even fathom. But sometimes it's just so hard to be still...even though maybe that's exactly what He's telling us to do. Be still and know. Know what? I don't feel like I know much of anything right now. Know...that He is God. (Deep breath.) I DO know that He is God, and He is Sovereign over all things, including all the little details of my life. This gives me peace. For a while. Until I start to feel anxious again, mainly because I feel I should be doing something. Anything. I find myself becoming even more confused when I read that we should wait and trust, and allow Him to work in our lives; then I read how we should be moving in faith, and it's up to us to take the first step and then God will show up. I question if I've missed something; did He tell me and I just didn't get it?  Is it right in front of my face and I just can't see it? Joyce Meyer says we are not to be confused, just wait... expectantly. Then one day there will be a "suddenly" and everything will change. But it will be in His perfect time. (Deep breath, again. Inhale peace; exhale calm) Indeed I have so much to learn in this time of waiting. I know God is not the author of confusion, and therefore, it's not good for me to be this way. I pray that He will help me wait expectantly, and trust Him to do what only He can do.