Lost Time

I really don't know where the time has gone! Really! Seems like just yesterday we brought home a precious one-week-old baby girl and now she's six weeks old. Oh my goodness! I know I'm sleep-deprived.....extremely sleep-deprived......but I feel like I just blinked and lost five whole weeks. But yet in other ways, some days...even moments...seem to drag on and on and on. Oh well, time really is a funny thing. Like how we measure everything by it. Even our lives. And to think there will be no time in heaven. Wow! No clocks, no calendars, no deadlines to meet. I find it so hard to fathom. And yet so refreshingly wonderful! Is it time to go yet?

Mysterious Ways

I haven't blogged for quite a while because honestly I didn't know what to say. Sometimes I feel like there are so many things going on in my head, it's almost impossible to sort it all out. Wondering...questioning...waiting...and waiting...waiting some more. And the thing is I'm not sure exactly what it is I'm waiting for. Well, I thought I sorta knew. I've done my share of dreaming and planning, but God had other plans in mind. Proverbs 16:9 says we can plan our ways, but the Lord directs our steps. And Isaiah tells us that His ways are not our ways and His thoughts are way above ours. He works in mysterious ways. And He NEVER makes a mistake! So, today I find myself a little surprised and extremely blessed by the path He has set before us. It's definitely not anything I ever imagined, but I'm so thankful and amazed by His love. He truly is an awesome and amazing God! 

So Blessed

I just have to say that I am so incredibly blessed! Blessed to have a Heavenly Father who loves me, blessed to have a wonderful husband who loves me, blessed to have four awesome children who love me, blessed to have a church family who loves me, blessed to have fabulous friends who love me....I could go on and on and on. The thing is, I haven't always felt this way. There have been times when I have felt that no one really loved me; at least that's how I felt. I know it wasn't true, but feelings have a way of, well, feeling true. But when Truth is in your heart, you begin to understand how to sort out what's true and what's not, and learn to take every thought captive. (I'm still working on that one) I've spent way too much time and far too many years feeling down about myself and life in general. So that's why I am blessed to be able to write that I am truly blessed. Because I know it! I don't just feel it, I KNOW it. And blessings bring us so much joy! Thank you, Father.

Caring Father

As long as I live, I don't think I will ever fully comprehend the fact that my Heavenly Father cares so much for me. I mean, I know He cares for us all and loves us very much, but the way He cares about even the smallest details of my life just blows me away! My human nature is to think that He's way too busy to bother with itty, bitty me; much less to care about my itty, bitty problems or concerns. But He does! And He proves it over and over again! And I am so incredibly thankful that He is my faithful, caring Father!

Marvelous Mercy

So...I just need to vent and since this is my blog, I think I will. More and more, every single day, I find myself amazed and utterly sickened at the sinfulness and depravity of mankind! Seems like every where I turn, whether it's the newspaper, tv or computer, the horrifying stories of sin are there. Stories of women and children being forced into sexual slavery, parents abusing and sometimes killing their precious babies, and even local headlines of teachers violating and preying upon their students. Oh my goodness, I could go on and on and on! It's absolutely mind-blowing! Please don't get me wrong, I am not without sin. I am in need of God's mercy just as much as anyone else, but I find it so hard to understand how people can do these things. I find it even harder to understand how God can still have mercy on us. His heart is love. He commands us to love one another. These acts of wickedness are the farthest thing from that. How it must break His heart! How sickened He must be! I find that all I can do is cry out to Him "God have mercy on us all!"

Endless Love

Last night I couldn't get to sleep and I found myself thinking about how very much God loves us and always has. I thought about how easy it would have been for Him to stop with Adam and Eve when they messed up. He so easily could have said "That's it. They had their chance. Everything was absolutely perfect for them, but they had to go and eat from the one tree I told them not to!" And again with the people of Noah's day... He could have said "No more! They are so wicked; I'm done with them!" There are so many more examples, but I thought about the Israelites, and how they prayed and prayed that He would rescue them from captivity; then when He finally does, they complain about the conditions and wish they were back in Egypt. Oh how He could have called it quits right then...I mean, if at any of these times He had decided enough was enough, there would not have been a reason for His Son to die. I guess it's just hard for me to wrap my head around that kind of love that would put up with so much from the very ones He created for his glory. And that love that began way back before time is still very much alive today! That love, wrapped up in the form of Jesus, is not only with us, but in us. We live and breathe His love every single minute of every single day. This is just so amazing to me that He loves us with that kind of incredible, endless love.

God-Confidence

A confident woman is positive. Confidence and negativity do not go together. That's what Joyce Meyer says. And I agree. She goes on to say that being positive or negative is a choice, and either one comes from habits we form throughout our lives. The real key, I believe, is where we find our confidence. The world will tell us to believe in ourselves, we can do anything we set our minds to, etc., etc., etc. And while this may sound good on the surface, many who think this is their answer still struggle to be confident people. Why is that? Because our confidence must be found in God; the One Who created us. I have struggled my entire life with feelings of negativity resulting from extremely low self-confidence. I could never, EVER, find that confidence in myself. And sadly, no one really told me the truth...that I needed to base my confidence in God. Not me. Not self. I mean, come on, I know me. I know my faults. I know my fears. Why in the world would I ever place my confidence in me? But when I look to Him, I'm different. Not perfect. But different. I see mercy. I see grace. I see a love like no other. And suddenly I feel confident. In Him. His Word says that the Truth will set you free. It does. It really does! When I stop listening or believing the negative thoughts, and look to His Truth, I'm free! Free to live in the confidence that I am loved no matter what. Free to live in peace and joy that can only come from Him. I don't want to be a negative person. Who enjoys being around someone who always brings you down? I know I don't. And I know I have to make a choice every single day, sometimes minute-by-minute, to be a woman of peace and joy. Satan knows that if he can steal my joy, he's stolen my day. I will not let him have that victory! Lord, I look to You for my confidence. Help me each day to make the choice to drive away the negativity and be filled with Your peace and Your joy, so that it may overflow onto everyone around me. Thank You, Jesus.